Thursday, July 3, 2008

Gift Wrapping

So, I'm an hour into my marathon 15 hour day here at work and instead of doing something productive for my company I've been busy wrapping some gifts to send out tomorrow.

Let the record show that the reason I've never volunteered to wrap gifts at the mall during the holidays is NOT because I am a Scrooge-y Grinch. It is because I absolutely suck at wrapping presents and people would probably cry if they saw a gift wrapped by me under their Christmas tree/received it for Channukah. I've never wrapped one, but I'm pretty sure I'm the only person in the world that could make a lovely, heartfelt diamond engagement ring look like a lump of coal all wrapped up and sealed with a bow.

My intentions are always good... I like to buy really cute wrapping/tissue paper, bags, and ribbons and things... but intentions are unfortunately not results.

Seriously, I don't know how I am so fucking retarded at it. I even manage to slightly screw up elementary square and rectangular things.

Sarah's gift wrapping skills = FAIL.

4 comments:

jeff said...

you and me, both. no matter what, i always end up with too little paper to cover the box, or too much paper on the ends. i finally gave up and just started handing people wads of cash.

Sarah said...

Wads of cash, eh? Be my friend.

jeff said...

you want a handful of sweaty, one dollar bills? [i'm actually just re-gifting from my night job at chip & dales]

Lara said...

sarah i'm sure you're not actually that horrible. I love wrapping gifts - I find some sort of calming pleasure (I swear I'm not a complete freak!). I think the best tip is to always have a even surface - put things in boxes - they're much easier to wrap than awkward shapes. And I swear you'll get better with practice!! You're making me want to buy gifts just so I can wrap