Inspektør Tingest...OR... if Inspector Gadget was Danish...

Inspector Gadget was one of my favorite shows as a kid. Today, over my normal Danish-to-the-max lunch of smørrebrød med pålæg (open faced sandwich with, um, stuff on it) and tomato soup, I got to talking with Libby about what kind of gadgets my favorite bumbling Inspector would have if he were Danish.

First, his name would translate to Inspektør Tingest, which goes nicely with the song:

Inspektør Tingest
Ooh ohh
Inspektør Tingest

Inspektør Tingest
Ooh ohh
Inspektør Tingest

Gå Tingest gå
Gå Tingest gå

Inspektør Tingest
Ooh ohh
Inspektør Tingest

... but I wouldn't be surprised if the Danes made it something like Inspektør Tingestsen either, to make it as Danish as possible.

Now, for the gadgets... Among his usual helicopter, umbrella, spring and stretch legs, etc., he would have some things suited specifically for living in Denmark. They would be stated in the usual "Go-go-Gadget" command style, but in Danish, of course:

1. "Gå-gå-Tingest-fyrfadslys!" (Go-go-Gadget-tealights!) - Perfect for creating hygge when badies come around to fight. Hygge is like weed. No one ever fights when they are stoned. Likewise, no one ever fights when they are hyggelig. Hygge and Hatred are antonyms.

2. "Gå-gå-Tingest-cykel!" (Go-go-Gadget-bike!) - Extremely necessary for Copenhagen. Everyone needs a bike, not least of all Inspektør Tingest. For night time he would also be able to utilize the command "Gå-gå-Tingest-cykel lygter!" (Go-go-Gadget-bike lights!) so he wouldn't get pulled over and given a ticket while he was chasing badies. Also, "Gå-gå-Tingest-regnbukser!" (Go-go-Gadget-rain pants!) for when it's raining. Handy and so Danish it hurts.

3. "Gå-gå-Tingest-saltlakrids!" (Go-go-Gadget-salt licorice!) - Best when used against non-Danish badies. One taste and they are down for the count, clutching their throats and crying for Mama.

4. "Gå-gå-Tingest-klippekort!" (Go-go-Gadget-clip card!) - The Inspektør uses this when he has to ride public transportation to catch a badie. Danes never cheat and ride for free, and neither would Tingest.

5. "Gå-gå-Tingest-vejkryds!" (Go-go-Gadget-crosswalk!) - Tingest uses this handy gadget for crossing streets to chase after badies in the middle of the night. He shoots out his own crosswalk whereever he wants so he doesn't have to wait for the light to change. It comes shooting out of his wrist, like Spiderman's webs. Spectacular.

More may follow as I continue to Dansk-ify my favorite childhood tv show.

Man, I would totally watch Inspektør Tingest.