Looks like the stateside equivalent of Copenhagen's City Bike program (Bycyklen) is coming to Washington, D.C.! Though I would be out-of-my-mind terrified to ride my bike in D.C., it's exciting, nonetheless.http://pqliving.com/?p=1341
Thursday, February 28, 2008
Bikes in D.C.!!
Looks like the stateside equivalent of Copenhagen's City Bike program (Bycyklen) is coming to Washington, D.C.! Though I would be out-of-my-mind terrified to ride my bike in D.C., it's exciting, nonetheless.http://pqliving.com/?p=1341
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
Clear the Water, Snark Attack!!!
Okay, not a very funny joke, I know, but some people (cough, cough, Søren, cough) have alluded that my recent posts have been too snarky. I think the article that he emailed me (below) earlier today likely has something to do with it:
Unfortunately, I don't work with idiots, I work for idiots. By that I mean the "customers" I serve are idiots. Sometimes I thank my lucky stars that I'm not completely retarded and self-insufficient. Make that often. Often I thank my lucky stars... My whole solar system of lucky stars containing the wit and wisdom that helps me get by day-to-day.
Now, to be completely fair, not everyone I work for is an idiot (and, on that note, I believe idiot is an extraordinarily harsh term, but in keeping with the article...). But enough of them are to make me feel like I am in the teeth-gnashing depths of Hell at least twice a day. In order to counteract some snark, I'm posting the absolute hyggeliest, feel-good picture I can find:
Flowers, candles, and cake. Snark medicine. Antisnarkamine. I feel better already. Sort of.
Unfortunately, I don't work with idiots, I work for idiots. By that I mean the "customers" I serve are idiots. Sometimes I thank my lucky stars that I'm not completely retarded and self-insufficient. Make that often. Often I thank my lucky stars... My whole solar system of lucky stars containing the wit and wisdom that helps me get by day-to-day.
Now, to be completely fair, not everyone I work for is an idiot (and, on that note, I believe idiot is an extraordinarily harsh term, but in keeping with the article...). But enough of them are to make me feel like I am in the teeth-gnashing depths of Hell at least twice a day. In order to counteract some snark, I'm posting the absolute hyggeliest, feel-good picture I can find:
Flowers, candles, and cake. Snark medicine. Antisnarkamine. I feel better already. Sort of.
Monday, February 25, 2008
Monday Tidbits
Slow day at work...
Ikea Guilty of Cultural Imperialism?! or, The Danes Overreact Again! - Nyhedsavisen (self-proclaimed as Denmark's Biggest Newspaper) recently ran a front page article (that's right, folks, front page) accusing Ikea of "bullying" Denmark because names of Danish towns are relegated to "lower value" items, like doormats.
"I for one am sure that it is done deliberately." - Michael Gajhede, Professor of Biostructural Research, Department of Medicinal Chemistry, University of Copenhagen.
"I hate those Swedes! They believe they can step all over us - like on a doormat! But we Danes and you with your Danish ancestors are better than them... Funny!"- Stine Svenningsen, Danish Institute for Study Abroad Receptionist and all around sweetheart :)
Also, Tramp Stamps = gross. Tramp Stamps on your WEDDING DAY?! = Might as well get married at the trailer park.
Man chokes to death on cupcakes! Sad. :(
Ikea Guilty of Cultural Imperialism?! or, The Danes Overreact Again! - Nyhedsavisen (self-proclaimed as Denmark's Biggest Newspaper) recently ran a front page article (that's right, folks, front page) accusing Ikea of "bullying" Denmark because names of Danish towns are relegated to "lower value" items, like doormats.
"It seems to be an example of cultural imperialism," Klaus Kjøller, Assistant Professor in Political Communication and the Danish Language at the University of Copenhagen. "Ikea has chosen the objects with the lowest value and given them Danish names," he added.Riiiight. I emailed the article to some Danes to get their opinion:
Doormats and rugs such as Köge, Sindal, Roskilde, Bellinge, Strib, Helsingör and Nivå are all "seventh class" citizens in the hierarchical world of Ikea furnishings, according to Kjøller.
"Ikea is a very professional company. I don't think this can be a coincidence," he said.
But according to Ikea spokeswoman Ylva Magnusson, that is exactly what it is.
But Klaus Kjøller is not convinced.
"It's hard to imagine it's not intentional," he said.
In an unrelated but interesting aside, the Copenhagen academic also pointed out that "it is exactly 350 years since the Swedes took the Halland, Skåne and Blekinge regions from Denmark."
"I for one am sure that it is done deliberately." - Michael Gajhede, Professor of Biostructural Research, Department of Medicinal Chemistry, University of Copenhagen.
"I hate those Swedes! They believe they can step all over us - like on a doormat! But we Danes and you with your Danish ancestors are better than them... Funny!"- Stine Svenningsen, Danish Institute for Study Abroad Receptionist and all around sweetheart :)
Also, Tramp Stamps = gross. Tramp Stamps on your WEDDING DAY?! = Might as well get married at the trailer park.
Man chokes to death on cupcakes! Sad. :(
Saturday, February 23, 2008
Top 10 Things I Hate, Gym Edition.
It's a good thing working out releases all those feel-good endorphins to help combat these top ten things that bug me at the gym (in no particular order):
There was this woman at the gym last week working out on the treadmill next to mine. I have two gripes of which she is a prime illustration, so she will be numbers one and two on my list of things that bug.
1. People that wear unnecessary workout gear. This treadmill woman was wearing one of those running underwear thingamabobs that, in my opinion, people only need to wear if they are a) in the Olympics or b) running a marathon (and, really, not even then). Moreover, she was jogging along at a mere 8km/h pace. Jogging at this pace especially does NOT warrant wearing those "look-at-me, I'm a super-runner!" bottoms. Unfuckingnecessary. I feel for the people standing behind us waiting for a treadmill to open up as they were surely having a tough time looking at everything else possible in the room, trying to politely avert their eyes from the horror that was her jiggly thighs. Other examples of unnecessary workout gear include people who wear those little belts with multiple bottles of water, protein gels, etc. to fuel their "superhuman" 45 minute workout and people who wear sweatbands simultaneously on their head and wrists. Dumb.
2. Window Watchers. Back to the woman on the treadmill. So, she was running at 8km/h. I and other people around me, on the other hand, were running at a significantly faster paces (I was going 10.2), red-faced, and sweating. I was trying to reach an (arbitrary) 10k goal time so I knew I had to keep running at a pretty decent clip for the better part of an hour. I was doing okay, breathing well, muscles working together, my shoulder didn't hurt (for once), and I was not fatigued... BUT I was hot as hell. Seriously, I felt very similar to the way I feel when I run outside around mid-afternoon during the summertime in the Mid-Atlantic. Knowing I'd never be able to make my self-imposed time goal if I had to keep running in this heatwave of a gym, I paused my machine for 45 seconds, hopped down, and opened the window behind me. I could almost feel the wave of relief washing over my fellow fast-paced runners as I returned to my treadmill on the crest of the cool breeze now flowing through the window. My feet had barely returned to my treadmill when "gross bottoms" next to me hopped off her treadmill to close the window. WHAT?! I turned and asked her, probably a bit hysterically, what she was doing. She informed me that I couldn't just open the window like that, people would get sick from the cold air. I informed her that people don't get sick from cold air, they get sick from viruses and bacteria, and that it was really hot and I felt myself and some of the people around us could benefit from having the window open during our workout. She told me she would only be running for two more minutes and then I could open the window. I begrudgingly resumed my workout in the Serengeti heat. She worked out for at least ten more minutes (two minutes?! lie teller!) during which the rest of us sweat like fat Asian guys in a sauna. If she hadn't been wearing those ridiculous running bottoms or going at such a lame pace she probably wouldn't have been so cold. And if she hadn't been so stupid she would know that cold weather is merely a catalyst for and does not cause illness. Needless to say, my slowed pace in order to avoid certain heat stroke while the window was closed made me miss my 10k time that night by eight seconds. Bitch.
3. People who work out on the elliptical at a glacial pace for twenty minutes, wipe the non-existent sweat off their brow, and head straight to the vending machine for a protein shake and powerbar. Nuh-uh. You did not work hard enough for that. Don't you know you just consumed what little you burned off and more?! No wonder you are still fat and out of shape.
4. People who insist on working in on the weight machines even though it entails both of you adjusting the seat and the weights between each set, thus taking way more time then it would have had they had just waited for you to finish.
5. People that don't wipe down the machines after they have sweat all over them. This especially applies when you can see the outline of your sweaty butt print. Gross.
6. When I am working out on the elliptical, reading a magazine, and whomever is next to me keeps looking over at what I am reading. "Um, I'm about to turn the page, are you finished?"
7. People who workout in improper footwear. I don't know if this is a Danish thing or what, but since when is it appropriate (in terms of safety, for the most part!) to work out in socks or, worse, flip flops? Get some sneakers.
8. People who stare at you while you workout. Yes, I know the rowing machine is directly across from and facing the treadmill I am on, but do you really have to look at me the entire time you erg? There is a whole room full of people. Shift your gaze every now and then or watch the meters go by on the machine. I don't want you to see if I start lip-syncing by accident.
9. In the locker room: People who unnecessarily take up an entire bench with all their stuff, especially during peak hours when there are a lot of people trying to get changed. Also people who walk around naked for longer than they need to before or after they shower; though, I digress, there is a smidge of benefit to this. Women who walk around naked in the locker room who are hot can serve as motivation and inspiration to all of us mere mortals. They give us something to think about during the last bit of our workout where we are pushing hard but losing steam and thinking about going home early and stopping to pick up our friends Ben & Jerry on the way, you know? Women who walk around naked in the locker room who are NOT hot can serve the same benefit, in reverse naturally. God, I sound so pervy.
10. When two friends (usually female) will stand around talking and waiting, waiting, waiting to get two machines next to one another to work out. More often than not, once they are working out they don't continue their conversation. Why bother waiting around for adjacent machines in the first place?
There was this woman at the gym last week working out on the treadmill next to mine. I have two gripes of which she is a prime illustration, so she will be numbers one and two on my list of things that bug.
1. People that wear unnecessary workout gear. This treadmill woman was wearing one of those running underwear thingamabobs that, in my opinion, people only need to wear if they are a) in the Olympics or b) running a marathon (and, really, not even then). Moreover, she was jogging along at a mere 8km/h pace. Jogging at this pace especially does NOT warrant wearing those "look-at-me, I'm a super-runner!" bottoms. Unfuckingnecessary. I feel for the people standing behind us waiting for a treadmill to open up as they were surely having a tough time looking at everything else possible in the room, trying to politely avert their eyes from the horror that was her jiggly thighs. Other examples of unnecessary workout gear include people who wear those little belts with multiple bottles of water, protein gels, etc. to fuel their "superhuman" 45 minute workout and people who wear sweatbands simultaneously on their head and wrists. Dumb.
2. Window Watchers. Back to the woman on the treadmill. So, she was running at 8km/h. I and other people around me, on the other hand, were running at a significantly faster paces (I was going 10.2), red-faced, and sweating. I was trying to reach an (arbitrary) 10k goal time so I knew I had to keep running at a pretty decent clip for the better part of an hour. I was doing okay, breathing well, muscles working together, my shoulder didn't hurt (for once), and I was not fatigued... BUT I was hot as hell. Seriously, I felt very similar to the way I feel when I run outside around mid-afternoon during the summertime in the Mid-Atlantic. Knowing I'd never be able to make my self-imposed time goal if I had to keep running in this heatwave of a gym, I paused my machine for 45 seconds, hopped down, and opened the window behind me. I could almost feel the wave of relief washing over my fellow fast-paced runners as I returned to my treadmill on the crest of the cool breeze now flowing through the window. My feet had barely returned to my treadmill when "gross bottoms" next to me hopped off her treadmill to close the window. WHAT?! I turned and asked her, probably a bit hysterically, what she was doing. She informed me that I couldn't just open the window like that, people would get sick from the cold air. I informed her that people don't get sick from cold air, they get sick from viruses and bacteria, and that it was really hot and I felt myself and some of the people around us could benefit from having the window open during our workout. She told me she would only be running for two more minutes and then I could open the window. I begrudgingly resumed my workout in the Serengeti heat. She worked out for at least ten more minutes (two minutes?! lie teller!) during which the rest of us sweat like fat Asian guys in a sauna. If she hadn't been wearing those ridiculous running bottoms or going at such a lame pace she probably wouldn't have been so cold. And if she hadn't been so stupid she would know that cold weather is merely a catalyst for and does not cause illness. Needless to say, my slowed pace in order to avoid certain heat stroke while the window was closed made me miss my 10k time that night by eight seconds. Bitch.
3. People who work out on the elliptical at a glacial pace for twenty minutes, wipe the non-existent sweat off their brow, and head straight to the vending machine for a protein shake and powerbar. Nuh-uh. You did not work hard enough for that. Don't you know you just consumed what little you burned off and more?! No wonder you are still fat and out of shape.
4. People who insist on working in on the weight machines even though it entails both of you adjusting the seat and the weights between each set, thus taking way more time then it would have had they had just waited for you to finish.
5. People that don't wipe down the machines after they have sweat all over them. This especially applies when you can see the outline of your sweaty butt print. Gross.
6. When I am working out on the elliptical, reading a magazine, and whomever is next to me keeps looking over at what I am reading. "Um, I'm about to turn the page, are you finished?"
7. People who workout in improper footwear. I don't know if this is a Danish thing or what, but since when is it appropriate (in terms of safety, for the most part!) to work out in socks or, worse, flip flops? Get some sneakers.
8. People who stare at you while you workout. Yes, I know the rowing machine is directly across from and facing the treadmill I am on, but do you really have to look at me the entire time you erg? There is a whole room full of people. Shift your gaze every now and then or watch the meters go by on the machine. I don't want you to see if I start lip-syncing by accident.
9. In the locker room: People who unnecessarily take up an entire bench with all their stuff, especially during peak hours when there are a lot of people trying to get changed. Also people who walk around naked for longer than they need to before or after they shower; though, I digress, there is a smidge of benefit to this. Women who walk around naked in the locker room who are hot can serve as motivation and inspiration to all of us mere mortals. They give us something to think about during the last bit of our workout where we are pushing hard but losing steam and thinking about going home early and stopping to pick up our friends Ben & Jerry on the way, you know? Women who walk around naked in the locker room who are NOT hot can serve the same benefit, in reverse naturally. God, I sound so pervy.
10. When two friends (usually female) will stand around talking and waiting, waiting, waiting to get two machines next to one another to work out. More often than not, once they are working out they don't continue their conversation. Why bother waiting around for adjacent machines in the first place?
Friday, February 22, 2008
I wonder if Yorkshire Bank PLC Are Fascist Bastards is on Facebook...?
I think this is relatively old news because I couldn't find a current "legitimate" news link for it, but this came up during Trivia last night at The Globe and I thought it was funny enough to post.
Hahahaha, zing!!After being charged £20 for a £10 overdraft, 30 year old Michael Howard of Leeds changed his name by deed poll to Yorkshire Bank PLC Are Fascist Bastards. The bank has now asked him to close his account, and Mr.Bastards has asked them to repay the 69p balance, by cheque, made out in his new name. The Guardian
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
Insomnia
Because I can't sleep (oh, the already apparent redundancy of this post)... top 5 things I do when I have insomnia:
1. Lay awake in bed becoming increasingly grouchy, wondering why I can't sleep.
2. Read a book (currently Richard Dawkin's The God Delusion)
3. Read Missed Connections on Craigslist (usually Washington, D.C.)
4. Look up random stuff online (tonight I googled 'sneeze in sleep' because I was wondering if people sneeze while they sleep)
5. Eat something small (usually a mix of carbs, protein, and fat in hopes that it will help me sleep. For example, a banana with a bit of peanut butter. No snack tonight.) or have a cup of decaf tea (No tea either.)
Blah.
1. Lay awake in bed becoming increasingly grouchy, wondering why I can't sleep.
2. Read a book (currently Richard Dawkin's The God Delusion)
3. Read Missed Connections on Craigslist (usually Washington, D.C.)
4. Look up random stuff online (tonight I googled 'sneeze in sleep' because I was wondering if people sneeze while they sleep)
5. Eat something small (usually a mix of carbs, protein, and fat in hopes that it will help me sleep. For example, a banana with a bit of peanut butter. No snack tonight.) or have a cup of decaf tea (No tea either.)
Blah.
Monday, February 18, 2008
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