$3 Quadrillion Pipe Dream

Katrina Victim Sues for $3 Quadrillion

Someone in Baker, Louisiana, 93 miles from Hurricane Katrina's epicenter is suing the U.S. Federal Government for $3 quadrillion.

For the sake of perspective: A mere $1 quadrillion would dwarf the U.S. gross domestic product, which Scott said was $13.2 trillion in 2007. A stack of one quadrillion pennies would reach Saturn.

According to the MSNBC article, Baker is home to a trailer park which has been home to hundreds of evacuees since the storm. Apparently it is also home to an ivory tower where the $3 quadrillion dollar plaintiff lives.

I may be cold-hearted and ignorant to suffering, but I seriously don't understand how people can sue over natural disasters. (Granted, I've been unusually lucky with my natural disasters. When Hurricane Hugo hit my family's home in Charleston, SC in 1989 all we lost was a gutter and a downspout.) Sure, natural disasters suck and negatively impact your life and cause doubtlessly irreparable damage to both person and property... but it's a weather phenomenon!! Yes, the government could have given you more warning to get out of New Orleans, but that would not have prevented your property from getting storm-trashed! What should have been done? Maybe a nuclear weapon, artfully exploded in the Gulf of Mexico would have shipped Katrina on her destructive way. Maybe we should attack all natural disasters with nukes. Forest fires in California? Shit, send a nuke. Tsunami in Asia? Nuke the bastard. Tornadoes, earthquakes? My "Earth boy" nuclear weapon will give you something to quake about.

I hope you get your $3 quadrillion, whoever you are in Baker. Then you can be the ruler of the free world. You alone, because you will bankrupt the U.S... and then everyone will revolt and overthrow you. Down with Baker and down with you. Dummy.

I love this blog...

Copenhagen

It's been awhile...

I've been busy and internet-less at home, so I haven't had time or resources to blog recently. But now I'm back... hooray. There have been a lot of things over the past few weeks that, as they have flitted through my consciousness, I have considered blogworthy, but they have unfortunately since faded away. Oh well. A few things on my mind this morning:

Danish Weather

In recent years, Denmark has been placed first on a number of subjective "Happiness Scales." See here, here, and here. But, I wondered on my way to work this morning, how can a country where the weather can so often only be described as utter and absolute crap be so happy?

I've heard a number of people cite the Dane's overall lack of expectations as the primary reason for this seemingly overabundance of happiness. Danes wake up, go about their lives, and at the end of the day think to themselves "Gee, I didn't die today! Chalk another one up on the ol' survival calendar! Wow, this really was a great one, eh Bjorn?!"

I have another theory. My theory is that all animosity, bitterness, and overall ill-will in Denmark (otherwise known as anything falling into the general hypothetical category of classification that would be best titled 'uhyggelig') manifests itself as a Danish weather phenomenon I like to call "The Mist."

The Mist, to put it bluntly, SUCKS. The Mist generally appears every morning and lasts until around 10. It is best described as misting rain, bone chilling dampness, and grey skies of misery. The Mist is not enough to get you soaking wet, but will mist on your clothes enough during even the shortest of morning commutes (mine is less than 10 minutes) to leave you damp and miserable until lunch. The Mist also leaves the streets just slippery enough to make morning runs around the lakes miserable and bike commutes dangerous if the need to stop short arises.

The Mist is kinda like a dementor in Harry Potter. It sucks all the joy out of everything and makes you feel miserable. I can't even write about The Mist without feeling miserable. I hate the damn Mist and can't wait until Spring hits (probably not until April-ish). I miss my flip-flops. They aren't, unfortunately, Mist friendly footwear.

Weird Danish Habit

Putting burned out, used matches back in the match box. WHY do Danes do this?! It's not only weird and seemingly purposeless, but also annoying! The match heads generally crumble and fall off the old matches, so when you have to root through the box to find a usable match your fingers get all sooty and shit. Stupid.