Wednesday, April 29, 2009

I 'Senz' Disappointment...

Har, har. Faux-homophonic jokes.

But, seriously, remember when I was all excited about Gerwin Hoogendoon's Senz umbrella? I posted about it here and here. Well, I saw it and tested it (superstition be damned!) this past weekend at Takashimaya in New York City and was, I regrettably report, disappointed! Sure, it's kind of cool that you open it by pulling the handle DOWN, rather than UP, but other than that, not so much. The material felt cheap and holding it just looked weird. It might be cooler if you dress all in black and have an art-deco Aveda haircut. Otherwise, not so much. Just looks dorky, like the other part of your umbrella ripped away. Plus, when it's folded up, it looks like it could easily be mistaken for one of those sad ones you see turned inside out in industrial trashcans after a day of wind and rain.

I've gotta tell you, this is hugely disappointing because the Dutch don't usually let me down. They introduced me to Dutch bicycles (which are different from Danish bikes!), hagelslag, clogs (okay, my first pair of clogs were Sweden's famed Olsen brand, but let's not nitpick), and the Santa with the posse of black men (6-8, unfailing. Dutch Santa rolls deep.) But I've got to pass on the Senz. Too bad. I was really looking forward to looking chic while holding my umbrella in the middle of a tropical storm. :( (side note: If this was a real requirement, I would write Storm Tracker Jim Cantore. I'm sure he has the best trop-sto umbrella in the world.)

Back to the drawing board. I need a new umbrella soon because my cute black one with pink flowers from United Colors is rusting. RUSTING. What on earth? Shouldn't things that are engineered to be used in rain be made with materials that aren't susceptible to water-rust?! At least I have my wellingtons.

Tired. Going to bed. Ciao, ciao.

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Good Game, Good Game

Though you wouldn't know it if you based you opinion soley on the debaucherous behavior of AdMo "hoodlums" on any given Saturday night, we are quite proper here in Washington, D.C. Maybe it's because we are South of the Mason Dixon Line. Anyway, so when ine is riding the Metro during rush hour, it's all very civilized. We don't push or chew gum like cows and we know exactly how many minutes we have to wait for our next train so we don't get unneccesarily restless or annoyed (*ahem* NYC, Italy, other train systems...) When a train arrives, people form a tunnel to let others off before they board. It's all very civilized.

I think we could jazz it up in the afternoons, though. I get this unquenchable urge to stick my hand out, giving disembarking passengers a high five and a "good game" at the end of the work day. Like you used to do when you were a kid on a soccer team. Even the sucky kids got a high five and a "good game," just for playing. It should be the same with work. Like, thanks for coming out and playing today. It would be so fun. We would really be DC, UNITED. Sah-weet. Except, as I was typing this, I sneezed (in my hand) and people gave me dirty looks. Maybe we would have to postpone our rousing daily games of LIFE (board game: also fun) at time when the CDC is issuing infectious disease warnings, like swine.

Okay, enough Jack Handy for the day. My stop is coming. So, Sarah Says GOOD GAME!!!
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Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Puff Nasty

This shot was taken on the metro's red line between Gallery Place/Chinatown and Metro Center approx 5:15pm. Yes, it IS someone with a pink shower puff attached to the outside top handle of their rolling suitcase. Um, eew? I certainly understand if you want it to dry/avoid putting a mold-prone wet puff in your suitcase, but is hanging it out to collect germ particles (measles, scabies, rubella, lice, flesh-eating disease--leprosy!, oh my!) on public transportation/the mean streets of DC/in the belly of an airplane really a preferred alternative? Really?!? Another yuck-tastic display of stupidity, brought to you by the Planet Earth, in honor of Earth Day and, obviously, evolution -- when your familial line dies out from deadly disease picked up on that shower puff and passed on by YOU. (Too far?) Ask Darwin. Blech!

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Is this a joke? Am I retarded?

This is a sign in the Friendship Heights Metro Station in Washington, DC. Apologies for the darkness - my blackberry camera kind of sucks, and metro stations are lit like caves. This sign is one of the only sources of light in the tubular cavern. Seriously, I go down into Dupont and I'm like "Cool, spelunking! Damn, I forgot my headlamp." Anyways, I see this sign every morning on my way to work. It has been baffling me for weeks. I don't get it. Around the photo, it reads "THE OLD TRANSFER: You saved $.90 when you transferred from rail to bus." Then, below that, it says "THE NEW, TWO-WAY TRANSFER: With SmarTrip, you save $.50 when you travel rail to bus, bus to rail." Huh? Last I checked, $.90>$.50. Doesn't the old way to transfer save you more money? Am I missing something completely, blatantly obvious? Is there a subtlety I'm missing? Moreover, on top of your lost $.40, the SmarTrip card costs a one-time fee of $5. WMATA, I don't appreciate your ruse. (Clerks, anyone?) You underestimate the reading and perceptual abilities of Washingtonians (okay, and Marylanders. I'm not ashamed.). We didn't all go to DC Public schools (zing!) and we aren't all in that much of a hurry. Even if we are, the trains on the red line (which serves the aforementioned Friendship Heights station) is usually delayed anyway, forcing us to wait, read, and lapse into an untenable state of morning confusion. Hmpfh.
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Thursday, April 9, 2009


Yay, my new Hunter Wellingtons (official boot of the royal family!) have arrived!! They're perfect!! I'm actually hoping for a rainy day so I can puddle jump!! :)
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Wednesday, April 8, 2009

The WTF Blanket

I love snuggies (but slanket comes in better colors), but I love parodies more:

Metro Night Ride

Red line. Dupont to Friendship Heights, 8pm

Saw two things:

1. A man running (futiley) up the down escalator. The UP one was working just fine. Ghetto stairmaster, anyone? Did I mention it was one of those tiny, narrow one person ones?! The people coming down were NOT happy when he did the huff-n-puff-n-run-n-squeeze. Geezus.

2. ZOMG. I just saw a woman that must be at least XXXL wearing a COW PRINT trench coat!! Irony?!?!

Gah, DC!! What's in the water here?!
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Friday, April 3, 2009


Okay, maybe I'm going to Hell for this, but you'd think that, given the fact that he/she/it died when he/she/it was NINE YEARS OLD, Mitchell's family would have had a better photograph to use in memorial in the Friday, April 3 Washington Post obituary pages.

I'm just sayin'.